It took me about 5 minutes to compose myself enough to grab a huge wad of paper towels and go back in there and kill the thing. I grabbed it and threw it in the trash, but later retrieved it for Andy to confirm its identity as a roach.
When Andy returned home, he opened up the paper towel and the roach was still alive. I squealed in terror. He positively identified it as a roach, and proceeded to kill it.
I would make a terrible exterminator.