108 Queens Week – Hairy Subleaser


In 2006, I was gone for multiple theater contracts, and I subleased my room in Astoria to 3 people over that time period.

My first subleaser was a nice guy, who was apparently very hairy. When we met, he had a long sleeve shirt on so I never noticed.

My roommates didn’t contact me while I was gone about the matter, and they all got along fine; so It wasn’t until I returned that I saw the hairy remains left behind.

When I stripped the bed, I saw there were a ton of little hairs woven into the mattress cover. After about 30 minutes of trying to remove them, I gave up and threw it away. But when I came back, I saw that my mattress was covered as well.

It was much easier getting the hairs out of my mattress than the mattress cover; so I cleaned it up, and scrubbed it down.

Later, I had said something to my roommates about it, and I remember one of them saying, “When he took a shower, it was like tons of little hairs flew off of his body and attached themselves all over the shower walls. I have no idea what happened while he was in there, and I don’t want to know.”

I am glad I wasn’t there for that.


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