Exactly What We Needed


It’s been quite a year.

A few weeks ago, I was speaking to a friend about something that made me teary eyed. Her response was, “Well, you do cry a lot.”

I can’t recall crying in front of this friend, so I can only assume she had read my blog where the phrase “and I cried” appears more than once.

My goal last year was to speak frankly on my 10 years here in NYC, and yes, I did cry. Fear, frustration, aggravation, loneliness, and most importantly happiness has caused multiple waterworks over the past 10 years.

The past 12 months has been no different. I’ve dealt with a particularly crappy autoimmune disease, Andy had a few medical emergencies that were absolutely terrifying, and my aunt died. As Robin Roberts says, “Everybody’s got something.”, and it’s true, but these past twelve months have seemed harder than any in recent memory.

On Friday I received a call from Andy that he had just seen the doctor and was on his way to the hospital to have an emergency procedure. Unfortunately, this is not the first time this has happened in the past 12 months.

I was throwing a small get together this weekend for some friends, so I emailed everyone to tell them why we were cancelling.

When you live in a large city, far from any family, you can only hope to have amazing friends nearby. And we do. The number of people who called to offer help, whether it be bringing food to the house, rides to the hospital, or just prayers and good thoughts was moving. “Whatever we can do, just tell us. We’re just a phone call away!”

I have never been able to respond to these offers very well. I think it’s because when I am in these situations, I truly can’t think about and focus on what I need. Because of this, I have adopted the response of, “Well I do need $1,000,000 and a three-week vacation.” This is not very helpful to someone trying to assist, but I can never think of anything specific that is in the realm of possibilities.

We have two very tenacious married friends of whom the female half texted me yesterday. She wouldn’t accept my canned answer, and said they wanted to help. I responded, “I will let you know.” To which she replied, “You better. Don’t do this alone.”

I thought on it, but really couldn’t think of anything they could do to help.

This morning I was taking stock of what was in my freezer, and realized we needed to put in a meat order with Fresh Direct. With money a little tight, I said aloud,”It will have to wait.”

Two minutes later, I opened my email looking for a recipe, and I saw there was a Fresh Direct Gift Card in my inbox. It was from our tenacious friends. I couldn’t believe it. They went ahead and just got us what they thought would be the most helpful gift, and it ended up being exactly what we needed. I sat down, overwhelmed by their kindness, and I cried.

In times when life seems to really just suck, there is always some sweet reminder of just how wonderful the people we choose to keep around as friends really are.

Thank you to all who have offered their assistance and kindness this weekend. Your kind words and offers of help have meant the world to us. Andy is on the mend, and fingers crossed that life is back to normal soon.

In closing: I do cry. But the tears of joy seem to outnumber the tears of sadness. Why? Because some of the greatest residents of NYC are our personal friends.


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