What the @*#&?

Today was the second day in a row that the MTA decided to make my morning a living hell.

Continue reading



95622a4caa69209876f744ed0049f0cfI decided not to change my surname after marriage and my husband didn’t challenge me on the matter. Why? Because he’s amazing.

After almost 6 years, I am still happy with my decision. We sometimes get mail that refers to me by my husband’s surname, but we also get mail where his surname is mine. Both of these mistakes make me laugh because it illustrates how society has a hard time handling non-conformity.

A friend of mine recently started the process of changing her name after her wedding and from my view, it is such a pain in the ass. She started her process by going to the social security office on Friday and when she got back to work she said something like, “As the woman (in a heterosexual relationship), you have to do most of the wedding planning and after the wedding, you have to do all of the work to change your name to your husband’s. He doesn’t have to do anything.”


I know my friend well enough to know that her husband did help with some of the wedding planning, but she is right. In this matter of name changing, he gets to go on with his life and she has to take time off of work to go to the social security office, brave the NYS DMV, stress about the timing of getting her passport changed with her travel schedule, update credit cards, bank accounts, and more.

I don’t judge women who change their surname. The great thing is that woman in the United Staes HAVE the choice to change, or not to change, their surname. As Americans, women haven’t always had that choice.

However, because I didn’t go through any of this, I have to say that taking the male route in this scenario by not changing my name was very freeing. It reconfirms my decision to keep my name and not go through this antiquated rigamarole.

Sweet Singing in the Choir

b929b112660c32b65d6077d249b2e294I sing in a community choir in Brooklyn. Over the past 4 years, the membership cost of the choir has doubled and the school we are associated with has shortened the number of our performances. This fall we went 3 weeks with inadequate light in our rehearsal room before they changed the lightbulbs and the staff was annoyed that we even asked to have the bulbs changed.

We always have a winter concert in January or February, and that means having rehearsal on MLK Day, an observed holiday in NYC. We also have a summer concert that happens right after Memorial Day and we have to rehearse on Memorial Day.

Continue reading

Shovel it, Please

I am feeling old and grumpy as hell today. Sorry to anyone who may have encountered me in my fury.

We have a law here in NYC that you have to shovel at least a four foot pathway for pedestrians in front of your property.

For the past 6 winters this piece of crap CVS on Nostrand Avenue does the laziest job of shoveling and I am sick of it. So today I decided I had enough of their crap and I reported them to 311. Perhaps 311 is a black hole of complaints, but it still felt good to report them.

The owners of the property never shovel, they took the self checkout lanes out of the store so the lines are too goddamned long, and their prices are higher than Manhattan.

Just look at that lazy shoveling job:

I’m turning into my father.